Thinking

This month will mark the 4th anniversary of my going deaf. Despite knowing it'd happen two years in advance, it was still a hell of a shock when i woke up after my second surgery unable to hear anything. In the intervening years between then and now i've gotten used to it, mostly. But theres still times when i can't help but dwell on things, the sound of my families voices, music or even something as mundane as the noises people make when they moving around.

One of the more unexpected results, (although why i didnt expect it is beyond me) of my going deaf is i've alot more time in general to just think about things. Other people if they on a bus or going somewhere will talk to other people or listen to music or something to entertain themselves but for the most part i don't have that luxury. Instead i'm given time to think about things, this has had mixed results, some comical such as randomly recognising that my oldest friends initials when placed in front of my own spell ARSE. TO rather morbid things such as cursing the things i want but can't have.

No wonder deaf people get cranky, when the only voice you can hear is the one inside your head, you tend to get sick of listening to yourself go on and on.